


The Trouble With Wanting

by norainydays



Category: Anne with an E (TV)
Genre: F/M, S3 spoilers, anyways this is like angst with a nice fluffy ending, i needed this after that episode leave me alone okay, literally wrote this in 40 minutes and didn't even stop to edit it fkgkgk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-10-28
Packaged: 2021-01-05 04:21:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21207296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/norainydays/pseuds/norainydays
Summary: Anne can't hold in her anger and hurt and betrayal. And perhaps it's the best thing to happen to her.





	The Trouble With Wanting

"Anne, what are you doing here?"

Anne froze in the darkness enveloping her. Her red hair was not to be missed, and if there ever was a moment she wished her hair was darker it was now.

"Gilbert Blythe. What are _you_ doing here?"

"I forgot a book and I couldn't sleep, so I figured I'd just get it. Now, _what are you doing here_?"

"Nothing," Anne answered curtly, not in the mood to talk to Gilbert Blythe just at this moment. Or ever, frankly. To think she ever thought he was her destiny.

"You're clearly doing something, Anne. Now, you could tell me, or you could leave me to find out myself."

She scoffed. "Is that a threat, Gilbert Blythe?"

"No, Anne. I'm worried about you. Because you're walking around alone in the middle of the night and avoiding my questions. And because we're friends. Remember?"

"_I_ remember. Do you?"

"Wh - What is that supposed to mean?"

"Figure it out, Gilbert Blythe. Oh, and I'd appreciate it if you refer to me by my full name from now on. I reserve just plain old Anne for the people who care to tell me about big, life-changing things going on in their lives."

She couldn't make out his full-expression in the dark, but it broke her heart to know that she had hurt him. But he had hurt her first. She turned and began to walk away.

"Anne!"

She turned and furiously yelled, "What?"

"What happened?" Gilbert's voice didn't sound angry like she had thought it would, instead it sounded tired, a little broken, and a little more like the recently-orphaned boy she had tried to comfort years ago.

"Friends are supposed to tell each other stuff, Gil - I... My parents are dead. And I'm from Scotland. Did you know that? You never bothered to ask me, even after I tried to talk about it on the train back after I found out. I understand you were perhaps unhappy with me, and that I was rude the first time you accompanied me, but we had made up by then. You were distracted. And now I know why. I'm just hurt that you didn't tell me about the girl - _woman_ \- you are courting. I thought we were kindred spirits. Apparently I was wrong. And you have hurt me eternally by making me lose another kindred spirit, Gilbert Blythe."

"Anne...that's what this is about? Winnie and I...we're not...we're not courting officially."

Anne scoffed. "And now you wound me more by lying to me. The entire town knows, Gilbert. You met her parents. You're as good as engaged."

"Why does everyone keep saying that? She wanted me to meet her parents! It wasn't my idea. I'm not thinking that far ahead!"

She just shook her head and couldn't muster up any words. And after a minute or two of silence, she couldn't stop from falling onto the ground and breaking into sobs.

Gilbert's lantern was put on the ground as he tried to think of what he could do to comfort Anne.

"Is this what all men are like? Flaky and unreliable and liars? Because you were talking about 'the future' just a few months ago when I asked you about the take notice board, Gilbert. And now you're not thinking that far ahead? What changed?"

"Anne-"

"Perhaps I made the right decision before. Not only is my destiny to be the bride of adventure, but that's also the best path for me to take. I was foolish to ever think destiny was leading me towards _you_." Anne blurted out. She had no fear of telling Gilbert her long-gone feelings for him.

"What? Me? You thought..." Anne could imagine the look in his eyes. And it infuriated her, if only because the mere thought made her soul ignite.

And so Anne did what she had always done best. She walked away. And she cried herself to sleep, her mind momentarily forgetting about Josie's plight (no matter how much more trivial Anne's was in comparison) and focusing all its sorrow upon whatever had just happened. She wasn't even sure how she had made it back into Green Gables without waking Matthew or Marilla.

By the time the sun rose, her tears were mostly dry, but her cold felt as if it was back in full force and just then she could've cried for six hours more. This week was surely the second most tragical since she had met the Cuthbert's.

Anne was unusually quiet as she helped Marilla with breakfast, but Marilla simply appreciated the quiet moment, noticing nothing out of the ordinary.

Anne was so focused on the task at hand that she didn't hear Marilla say, "Why, Gilbert, come in? I have to run out to the barn, but I'm sure Anne can help you with whatever you need!"

She didn't notice Gilbert was in the kitchen at all, in fact, until he cleared her throat and said her name.

She huffed loudly, truly wishing that Gilbert would just disappear. "What do you need? Sugar. Flour. We have it all. We're doing something so this'll have to be quick."

"You're what changed, Anne."

It was Anne's turn to be confused. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"You asked me last night what changed from the take notice board to Winifred. It was you, Anne. You're what changed. I thought when you asked, you were talking about yourself. When I think about you, I think of our future. I can't help it. It just happens. It gives me...scope for the imagination. You were right, destiny has been leading you to me. And you've thwarted destiny long enough, Anne Shirley."

And suddenly Anne was on the verge of tears for the second time in a span of twelve hours, this time, however, for a completely different reason. "What about -"

"I'm...I wrote her a letter and explained that she deserves someone who cares for her, _loves her_, the way I do you. Anne, I'm sorry I ever hurt you. You don't know how much it pains me." He stepped forward, searching in her eyes for any sign of what she was thinking.

She whispered, "If I wanted to kiss a boy, I would just kiss him."

"Did you say something?"

Anne was pulled away from her thought and suddenly she was back and drowning in Gilbert's eyes. Oh, those stupid eyes. How they made her heart ache. And so Anne did what she had always said she would.

She kissed the boy she wanted to.

* * *

After that day, Gilbert did his best to always be there for Anne, and Anne did her best to be there for her.

He held her as she cried about Diana hiding her romance with Jerry, and she held him when he cried after finding out that his father's cufflinks were all the way in New York City, with no way for him to get them back. 

He talked her through nights where she couldn't close her eyes without thinking about the orphanage, and she talked him through nights when his grief overwhelmed his senses.

And they faced their life together, as rivals, as equals, as kindred spirits, as best friends, as fiancees, as husband and wife.

They could be miles and miles away from each other, and yet somehow, they were always together. Whatever life threw their way.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm on tumblr @anne-shirley-blythe if you wanna come yell with me over there! :) thank you for reading <3


End file.
